Comments on: Discussing Marriage Expectations

By: bea santiago

bea santiago — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 03:16:09 +0000

thank you for this, toni. very helpful for me and mark

You’re welcome B! Check out the wedding blog for more articles. Hope it helps you!

By: julie

julie — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 11:52:10 +0000

Expectations are wonderful ways to let another person know not just what to expect but to also be in the same level with your own expectations. When we lay things out in the open, we tend to not expect too much and not be disappointed too much. Feels boring since it seems there is predictability but then again, we may never know what surprises lurk around the corner.

Hi Julie! Better to talk about it early, right? Surprises are unavoidable but at least you’ll get most of the major issues out in the open early.

By: Rachel

Rachel — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 16:43:49 +0000

Hi Ate Toni. nice topic especially for newly weds. thanks for sharing. Have a blessed Sunday!

Best for those about to get married.

Have a good week!

By: odette

odette — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 15:41:28 +0000

very useful list you have indeed on a very interesting topic!

to add: my husband and i talked a lot before we got married, well, after 11 years of knowing each other, we covered most if not all topics under the sun. he’s dutch and i’m filipina so discussing expectations from each other is a must for us to avoid some culture clash. i’m glad we have a great communication line, it was easy to compromise on many things, such as:
1. pooling a common fund for the general domestic expenses as well as for common savings fund
2. he will respect my spiritual faith, and i will respect his lack of it, as he promises that he will take time to learn and know more about my belief by going to church with me
3. we will start our family after a year or two, when i have settled and adjusted well to my new home and country
4. he will let me pursue my passions, or work a dayjob and support me to grow professionally
5. major expenses and household plans are to be discussed and mutually agreed upon
6. vacations in our home countries are a must, or as long as budget permits
7. more than anything, it will always be us against the world, and never against each other.

i’m happy with the results of our popcom seminar. husband and i agreed with each other 95% of the time on our questionnaire. so far, so good.

Thank you for sharing those, odette! I’m sure your list will help others too. It’s great to be able to get this out in the open with our partners — saves on messy arguments!

By: Jeany

Jeany — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 02:45:35 +0000

Hi Toni. Thanks fro sharing this. Advices from a fellow wifey surely comes in handy. Which remind me..lapit na ng May. ilang months na lang.

Five years Jeanny!!!

By: Rach (Heart of Rachel)

Rach (Heart of Rachel) — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 22:54:57 +0000

This is very well written Toni. Thanks for sharing your own experiences and translating them into great advices.

Thank you Rach!

By: rye

rye — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 14:33:46 +0000

Thanks for sharing this, Toni. It’ll really come in handy when the time comes =)

Hi Ryan! I do hope it helps when that time comes indeed.